Beer Farts

DISCLAIMER: It’s common knowledge that women don’t fart, poop or God forbid, shart. So the following is based off research I have done, NOT my own experience.

A couple weeks ago we received the following message:

I’ll state the fact outright, I love your beer “Irish death,” and this email is no way complaining about the amazing beer you produce. The thing is that every time I drink your beer I have the most putrid vile farts the day after consuming. It’s crazy, the smell is pungent and lingers for 10 minutes or so. It’s almost as lethal as Sarin Gas. I’ve even gagged on my my own farts as a resultant. Never has a beer traveled through my digestive track and produced that stench. This email is to let you know I’ve successfully lit my own fart on fire from this noxious brew. You guys must be utterly genius for this new exploration into a fuel that could possibly challenge the fuels that feed our internal combustion engines these days. I love your beer, it just turns me a bit away that when I expel gas every other person around me must evacuate for fear of death. You’re​ team is great.

P.S.

Fuck those people, they will experience the annihilation farts and they will remember them.

Obviously this message made our day but it posed a question, why is it that we (and by we I mean men of course) get the beer farts?

Let’s start with why we pass gas in the first place. A toot is trapped air escaping our bodies. Whenever we eat, we swallow air, gas seeps into our intestines from our blood and some gas is produced by chemical reactions in our intestines or bacteria living in our guts. This gas/air must leave the body and it does so through your sin socket. Typically a fluff is about 59% nitrogen, 21% hydrogen, 9% carbon dioxide, 7% methane and 4% oxygen. Funny enough only about 1% of farts contain hydrogen sulfide gas which is what makes farts smelly.

So why does beer in particular seem to make some especially gassy? Beer makes your farts smellier because of the sulfate in it. Sulfur-containing chemicals can be found in DMS, malt, yeast and even hops. Obviously drinking involves swallowing air that has to come out eventually too. Drinking beer releases carbon dioxide gas which builds up in your gut. Beer consumption results in bloating and excess gas because it causes yeast overgrowth in the intestinal tract. Heavy or complex beers (i.e. Irish Death) are more likely to cause flatulence as they contain more complex sugars and live yeast to bind with those sugars. The digestive system isn’t as easily able to digest those complex beers. For most people (and by people I mean men) this means passing not so good smelling wind.

Beer can have serious effects if dealing with an intestine related disease or disorder. Beer can worsen ulcers and aggravate acid reflux, but for healthy humans, rectal turbulence might just be an unavoidable side effect of drinking the good stuff. So take a Beano, grab a beer and celebrate your body’s natural mechanisms.

7 comments on “Beer FartsAdd Your Comment

  1. Jim Harrison on

    While I’ve not been blessed with your particular bog of eternal stench, I recommend that you also try the effervescent combination of Mickey’s Big Mouth, Jalapeno nachos and pickled eggs.
    According to my wife, I could make a skunk run in fear after I’ve consumed that combination.

    Reply
  2. Alex on

    Funny enough, I was googling “why are my farts so bad with beer” and I pretty much only drink Irish Death, so it’s hilarious that this is the first article I found. If I have a few I have to be alone the next day because they’re literally so awful. The beer is delicious though.

    Reply
  3. Owen on

    I too have been blasted by beer farts the last 9 hours. I was not drinking Irish death but I am Irish and live in Ireland! Anyway the article explained why my house is like a chemical factory.

    Reply
  4. Beldar on

    I have a buddy who has the most vile ass imaginable.

    I must find your beer in my area, so that I stand a chance of fighting back.

    Reply
  5. Old Codger on

    I don’t drink “Irish Death” but I have noticed that my farts become particularly smelly after consuming my usual amount of brew – approx 40 oz of Steel Reserve 211 High Gravity Lager which is a brand of malt liquor. What causes the gas and the extra noxious odor? Will Beano help me there? Any help would be appreciated.

    P.S. I also enjoy Schlitz Malt High Gravity. Both are double malted, slow brewed, 8+% ABV brews.

    Reply
  6. Luke on

    @old codger, you drink horrible prison swill lol

    Reply

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