Have family? Forced to spend time with them? Read on.
It’s time. The time you ferociously text with your siblings on what to bring for the holiday, whose house it’s going to be at, what time and do you really have to invite Uncle Ron because no one will forget that one time when he said grace and it lasted over 6 minutes while the dressing got cold and the cranberries became lukewarm.
No worries friends, we have a plan for you to survive the holidays with not only Uncle Ron, but second cousin Cherise too, who always brings her newest emo boyfriend (despite your sage advice). Here are a few tips to surviving the holidays with your perfectly weird family:
- Take control. You are not going to like this, but it’s time to own Thanksgiving. You host, you tell people what to bring and god damnit you’re saying grace this year, Ron.
- Make mom do the hard stuff. Whatever this is, it’s her siblings she needs to regulate.
- Nix presents (for the adults.) Honestly, if you get one more set of pajamas in the wrong size and a hideous pattern from your mother-in-law, you might set the Christmas tree on fire.
- Your Uncle-in-law Steve, the one who’s shaped like a jelly bean? He can’t come.
- Humor them. Embrace the talk of politics no matter what side of the aisle you sit. There will always be time to argue with them on Facebook later.
- It’s not news that your father-in-law doesn’t like his son-in-law. Instead of ignoring the obvious, maybe it’s time to embrace it and make it real awkward for everyone.
And lastly, roll with the punches and provide plenty of liquid courage for quality entertainment.
[ the pub ] is open during regular hours Monday-Wednesday this week, but is closed on Thanksgiving so make sure to get your crowlers, growlers and six packs before the holiday or swing by your local grocery store so you’re ready for family time.