You know what’s funny?
The platypus. And a beaver dressed as a human. And drunk history.
You know what is less Funny?
When someone steals or accidentally borrows for a long time, our sign directing loving patrons to our tasting room. It is not funny, unless it’s a practical joke and the person will return it after seeing this post. In which case, good one dude, or dudette. I don’t think that’s a word. I also don’t think that’s the case, or maybe it is. I don’t know. I’m hedging a little here.
So the rest of this post is directed at two parties. The party responsible for 5 finger discounting the sign and the Party that knows this Party.
Everyone else; You are good people with a nice streak inside you, just waiting to burst out.
To the Party that lifted our sign: Return it. (I had stronger words than that, but realized they were superfluous.) You don’t have to tell anyone. You can do it in the middle of the night, after the feeling of shame overwhelms you. We will be good. I pinky swear.
I’m guessing that won’t happen, so…
To the Party that Knows the Party Steal it from them and bring it back to us. Okay, maybe try encouraging first. Or tell us. The point is, we are betting that at least one of you knows who did this, and we’d like you to consider being that angel your parents think you are.
I proposed an alternative course of action to Suzanne, to which she shot down; close the tasting room until the sign is returned.
She is clearly much smarter than I am.
Do we really care that someone jacked our sign? Sure, because people like Kasandra worked hard to get it made and plus, you know that shit costs money.
Do we really care THAT much? Probably not, there a bigger issues to worry about in the grand scheme of IHB brewery life. It sucks, we want it back, but we’ll deal.
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